My Experiences on Writing

I may have been writing a lot for my blogs these past few months; but before my blogs, my being a writer was just occasional. I only wrote for school projects, our school paper, or other requirements. I rarely wrote anything for leisure. Well, I actually made some poems and some sort of diary entries when I was an adolescent but I got rid of them later on since I found them childish and unworthy of keeping. Time went by, I graduated high school and entered college. Since then my writer self has been quite dormant; but there were things I had  to write for - like reaction papers and written reports.

It was only last November 2013, when I started writing for a non-academic purpose. I created a blogger account and launched my debut blog - the Haiyan Blog; this blog contains my personal account of Typhoon Haiyan. It was such an extraordinary event that I have never experienced before; I found it worth recording and sharing. Aside from that, I also wanted to preserve everything that was running on my mind on that instance, and all those experiences after the storm. The next blog I created was my Literary blog; in this blog are some of my essays and poems that I wrote when I was in high school. Most of these were school requirements which I decided to keep for future use. I actually have more essays and poems but some of which did not pass my quality control, and some are still pending. The third blog I made was the Multimedia blog; in this blog, I posted the products of my photo/video/audio editing. And the latest blog I launched was this blog. This is the blog where I put my personal experiences, ideas, thoughts, and also things I am currently up to. Well, I never really foresaw all these things to happen. I never really envisioned myself writing for my blogs; unlike before, now, writing has been a hobby to me already.

I got into writing in fifth grade when I joined the school news publication. I'm not really sure how I ended there but I guess it was because I was recommended by a teacher since I had good grades in English. I wrote articles covering on school events, and also some feature write-ups. To be honest, I didn't really enjoy those tasks. First, you have to take the details - the who, what, when, or where about the topic. Then, you have to make an entire article out of those details. That was what I didn't like; it was difficult for me since I didn't really know how to expound sentences. Unlike my peers who were more enthusiastic, and who wrote well, I was rather straight-forward in writing, and my articles were short and very plain. I wasn't skilled in making write-ups more interesting and worth reading. I'm pretty sure I always gave a hard time for our moderator to edit my submissions.

Since sixth grade, I became an insomniac; and it was really terrible. All those nights, my mind gets very chaotic with all the random thoughts running on my head. It's pretty weird because I couldn't just stop the traffic of ideas and imaginary scenarios happening on my mind; it was almost uncontrollable. Alongwith my becoming an insomniac, it was also during those times that I started to become mature mentally. I started to see the world in a new perspective; I realized that there was a big world out there that I am a part of. And that world was full of intricate systems that were not always fair to everyone. There are injustices, there are those who are favored more, and there are many things that are just not possible. I discovered that reality was far from being a perfect world. With this glimpse of reality, I sought to learn more; and during the process, I developed this social awareness and concern for the greater society itself. From then on, I learned to react to certain issues in the society.

However, during that era of my life, I also embarked on a quest to know myself. Since childhood, I have always been that solitary type of person; and I have spent most of my life contemplating on my own thoughts. It was during those times that my emotional and mental development heightened. On some instances, I would ponder of the meaning of life itself, or what my purpose could be. There were lots of questions springing from my mind; and these always kept me awake at night. But as I gained various experiences in the real world, I also learned to establish my own principles that I now uphold and believe in. Through time and experience, some of my questions were answered; while many others are still on queue. But nevertheless, this quest I have embarked on allowed me to unearth my own perspectives in life.

So I have just given a short background of myself. Now the question is: what made me decide to be a writer? Well, first of all, sometimes I also wonder on this matter. Second, I am not even sure if I can consider myself as a writer. I admit that I am not that gifted with the creativity to play with words and imagination; I only write in the manner I am comfortable to express my views. I also have a confession to make, it may be strange for you to hear; but I am not a person who is into books. Most of you probably thought I am writing because I have been inspired by the books I read, or the authors who wrote them. I am not against it; I have read a few novels in my lifetime, but I don't really find myself getting into it. The only reason I write is because I want to liberate all these imprisoned ideas and thoughts bursting out of my head. The only way to keep my mind from imploding is to set these thoughts free.

I have found meaning in writing. It has been a medium to fully express myself; it is a way for me to transform my abstract thoughts into an organized piece of literary work. But though the idea may sound enchanting, that process is truly very complicated. It is always a great battle for me. The way I write is not merely putting up everything I have in mind into a write-up. I have to make sure I am understood. I have to be clear and organized. I also want readers to feel what I wan them to feel. One goal of a writer is to establish a certain connection with the readers; I have to convey my messages well.

Through essay-writing, I can express my personal insights, and concern towards various pressing issues on the society. It is a means for me to raise social awareness especially to those who are uninformed. The main purpose of each essay is to influence readers, and let them be aware of the responsibility in being a part of the solution of these issues. It is truly a great challenge; that is why I wrote very rarely before. It takes a lot of effort, time, and patience to build a perfect write-up. I have to gather enough facts, ideas, insights, and some creativity to make it come to life. Yes, it is a struggle; but arms me for battle is the essential things I am equipped with. Having the right principles, a good perspective of things, right criticism, I could uphold my own stand on these certain issues.

It was in my second year high school that I started joining essay contests. I don't really remember whether I volunteered or I was chosen to be the representative of the group but still I pushed through with it. The essay contest was part of a yearly science event. There was a 2 or 3-hour time limit, minimum of 300 words, and the topic of what we would write were always based on the theme.  It was my first time joining an essay contest. In my younger years, I never knew what an essay was; I guess it was in 6th grade when we were taught about it. The most important thing I have learned about writing is that you have to be organized. There must always be an introduction, body, and conclusion; and each main ideas have to be supported by details.  Prior to this contest I already had little experience in writing insights, and reactions on journals, tests or other school papers. These actually helped me develop my own style in writing - on how I present my thoughts, and how I organize them into structures. These were the things that armed me for the contest. Anyway, the topic was about disaster awareness (as far as I remember) and it was quite a challenge since it was my first time to write with time constraint. Well, the first thing I did was list down the main ideas that would be the outline of my write-up; then, I expounded them with supporting details. Everything else I've written was about upholding my ideas and principle in solving the problem. It wasn't easy; as I am very fallible to time pressure, my hands were shaking as I wrote. And when I didn't know what to write next, I would panic. Then the time was due and we had to pass our works; thank God I actually finished writing. Okay, to conclude the story, one day I was called on stage to receive the award as champion of the competition. It was indeed an astonishing moment. From the start, I wasn't really that confident since it was my first time joining such competition. It wasn't something I expected; I never envisioned myself to be writing essays, or to be joining competitions. I just tried, and this was the result. I was really happy with it and since then I've decided to join that annual contest until my last year in high school. I challenged myself to protect the title; and yes, I actually did. Well, I guess I got the hang of it. Anyway, out of my three entries, I only retrieved one. It was the only entry that was published  on our school paper. I didn't have a copy of the others since they were never returned after submission. That one entry, which is now in my literary blog, has actually undergone a lot of revisions before I posted it. The original, which I wrote three years ago - I found it so substandard. I felt so ashamed while I was reading it.I had to re-work it some weeks ago for it to really pass my quality control. And that's why I shouldn't really be proud of my title; now I actually question myself if I deserved those awards. I don't know. I couldn't really say until I read the other two entries again. Well, anyway, whether I won those or not, writing for contests was a great learning experience for me. I was able to share my own insights through those essays. I was able to face the challenge of writing under time-pressure. Every essay-writing contest was an opportunity for me utilize my capabilities, and grow as a writer and as a person.

In my third year high school, I rejoined the school news publication. I was an opinion writer and I wrote two opinion articles each year. On some times, I was also assigned for other articles that covered school events. And yes, I still didn't enjoy doing those; I was only comfortable in writing opinion articles. The hard part was always finding a topic that I would want to react on. Though I was usually reactive to politics, the environment, or various social issues, I found it difficult to choose since I am very indecisive. And if ever I found my desired subject, starting a write-up was always difficult. It took days or weeks for me to finally start writing. It's actually a tedious process of breaking down clusters of disorganized thoughts so you could filter them into systematized ideas. It takes a lot of concentration (and coffee) for me to formulate a good write-up. Until now, that's always a dilemma. And aside from that, my passion for writing is only occasional. It's not everyday that I could write well. If I forced myself to write, I get very vague and senseless with my write-ups. But if there was an instance I had that burning passion, I could be unstoppable. I really have to savor that moment and finish the write-up before that laziness or exhaustion attacks. It's always an ecstatic moment when the flow of ideas is never-ending when I am writing. It's like my mind's the engine and that passion is the fuel that keeps me working smoothly. Anyway, when I finish an article, I get very relieved and satisfied with my work. However, the article's course doesn't end there; it still has to undergo a lot of revisions. After I submit them, our moderator would then cite my mistakes; may it be the title, the facts, or the details. There was a time when there was a very big mistake on my write-up. What I thought as facts were only my own assumptions. Later, I was able to revise it and make the article really based on facts. That really taught me a very important lesson - to always review facts before getting to react and conclude. Other mistakes that I did were contradicting myself in my own article. In my essays, as much as possible, I avoid being so biased. I also try to consider the other side of the issue. But I guess I took it too far. The sentence was: "However, I do not completely oppose to its implementation"; and all the while all statements above stated my opposition. The revision was: "However, I do understand that this law also has good purposes". Well, those mistakes were learning experiences. Writing for the school paper actually helped me improve in writing. It made me realize my own imperfections. Though I'm aware I'm never a perfect writer; on some instances I tend to be overconfident with myself. These mistakes serves me a reminder that I am not as great as what I think I am.

Fast-forward to the present time, I currently have 4 blogs running and I have been writing more frequently these past few months. I have a lot of plans for this personal blog; and there are a lot of topics I want to write about. However, my writer self only visits me very seldom. I haven't even finished Haiyan blog. I am actually ending it with an essay; but I'm still figuring out how I would formulate a perfect write-up for it. On my literary blog, I am still deciding which works from my high school will be added. And for now, I still have no plans on writing a new essay. Anyway, I still have 32 days of summer and I hope I could make the most out of these remaining days of freedom and boredom. I do hope I could keep myself busy by writing for my blogs. This is actually the only way I can be productive this summer. And I do hope I could continue expanding my own world through my blogs. Thank you for reading this write-up. I hope you learned something. Stay updated and never miss a post by following.  :)