Return to Regression

I guess this was inevitable. Although I foresaw this happening, this isn't exactly what I envisioned it to be. Getting lost would've been acceptable but it seems that I've been thrown out into space where I'm stuck and can't sail away. All I can do is flail around in this cosmic void until something interesting happens. I am disoriented, left with no points of reference to navigate through this circumstance. Where did I go wrong? - I finally ask myself. Was it a lack of preparation in my part? Do I bear all the fault for my lack of awareness? Could I have done something to avoid all these? Maybe I'll have to undergo the necessary struggle to know the answers. 

Looking back, it was a journey where I last found profound meaning; but that stage already came to a close. I can no longer go back and make the outcome any better. I've come past my intended waypoint and now I have to find something new. I have to venture into a new meaningful endeavor. But what do I bring into future when I failed to prove my worth in the past? Had I managed to attain the objectives I set for myself, I could've had a clearer idea of my next destination and it would've just been a walk in the park. Unfortunately, that didn't happen. So now I stumble around, trying to find my way. 

I searched thoroughly but as I went along, my efforts turned out to be futile. This land and all it contains are unfamiliar to me. I feel unequipped. There seems to be no ideal place when  reaching this stage. Maybe I should just turn back? I'm not sure. My vision is clouded with fog and mist. I can only look internally. Just when I thought I was already adequate, I then find out how hard it is to find a place where my value would be realized. I never thought I could end up being so devoid of doors for opportunity. So now, where do I even knock? This phase brought so much promise but never really delivered.

I don't think I'm in any hurry to escape from the current state that I'm in; I just really need to move forward but this whole situation is restraining me. I guess I'll just have to scale down my efforts and take time to ponder on what I want to do next - at least that's the idea. But I already know how things would turn out when I can't move forward. It's the unexpected return to the realm.