Three years ago, in my high school, I didn't really have an idea of what I wanted to become in the future; even my family didn't know what course I would be taking. However, I was sure I wanted to be an engineer. I just didn't know which branch of engineering I would go for. My first option was actually chemical engineering since chemistry was one of my favorite subjects. But apparently, I had to take it off from my list because I had experienced a lot of health issues during my high school; and I thought it wouldn't be a good option especially there's vulnerability getting exposed to chemicals. For a period of time, I was clueless about my career preference. But eventually, in the next few months, as I was immersed on various types of school projects, I found myself enjoying those about making models of buildings and bridges. There's always that feeling of relief and contentment on whatever project I finish; but there was something different on dealing with those types of projects. I get excited to work on them, and I enjoy every part of the process. May it be the planning, or the execution, I always worked passionately on them, and I maintain a good attitude towards it. Overall, it was a very interesting and enjoyable learning process for me.
For this reason, I was already convinced that Civil Engineering would be my chosen career path. It wasn't a decision I took out of rush. I have actually thought about it for quite some time and I realized that there were also other factors that makes me fit for the program. Geometry and Analytic Geometry were my other favorite subjects; I was highly interested in geometric principles, and its applications as well.. Although almost everyone I know hated these subjects, I actually enjoyed studying them. Another factor dates back to my childhood. When I was a child I was very fond of making buildings, houses, and even a miniature city made out of Lego blocks together with my siblings. At a very young age, I was already so fascinated with the idea of designing and building structures.
In our senior year in high school, we have undertaken aptitude tests, interest tests, and other activities that helped us choose the best career option. My aptitude test's results revealed I was eligible to most of the fields but except on social services. However, according to the results of the interests test, my greatest inclination was on the engineering field. Eventually, as the months went by, I was already sure of my choice, and I did not consider any other programs anymore since those factors were already enough to convince me to push through with my decision.
In our senior year in high school, we have undertaken aptitude tests, interest tests, and other activities that helped us choose the best career option. My aptitude test's results revealed I was eligible to most of the fields but except on social services. However, according to the results of the interests test, my greatest inclination was on the engineering field. Eventually, as the months went by, I was already sure of my choice, and I did not consider any other programs anymore since those factors were already enough to convince me to push through with my decision.
Two years passed by, and currently, I'm starting my second year in college as a student on the Civil Engineering program. Unlike the previous two semesters when we were taught more of general subjects, now we would be taking subjects related to our chosen course. It's quite an indescribable feeling to witness your own future starting to unfold in front of you; it's when you start to learn about the basic things that would set foundation to the career you are building. Yes, it actually does sound exciting; however, it's not the feeling that is prevailing within me; it is doubt and fear that outweighs.
Honestly, right now I cannot really say that I am perfectly sure of the career I have chosen to pursue. Basically, I have chosen this program because I thought I had the innate qualities that make me fit for this career. Contrary to how most people think, I did not choose this profession because it is an in-demand job today in our world. We're aware that wherever city we may go, construction is booming; and that Civil Engineers are highly paid within and outside the country. With the high demand for Civil Engineers today, the number of aspirants is equivalently high as well. To be honest, I haven't actually foreseen all these things; I've only learned about these from some of my friends, and from news articles. The path I thought was easy actually had much difficulties in store, especially I was just among the thousands of aspirants.
The dilemma I am facing right now is that I cannot visualize the outcome of my career choice. All these times, I only considered my capabilities as a person; but I have failed to consider the actual direction this decision is leading me into. It's not that I am no longer interested with this program; but it's just because I am greatly unsure whether I am capable of dealing with the things practiced in this profession. I am very uncertain weather I could still be enthusiastic enough to learn more in the field I thought was best for me. I am in doubt of myself.
With my first few months in college, I did realize that I could utilize my knowledge and skills in dealing with the different aspects of the program; however, I also became aware of my own weaknesses that make me susceptible to failure if ever I could not overcome these. Though I may have managed to cope up with some difficult challenges in a year of studying, still I remain unconfident and afraid of the greater adversities that lie ahead in this career path. I always feel this incertitude whenever I contemplate on my lack of knowledge and skills in this field. Another discouraging thought is realizing I have undesirable traits as I dealt with various recent experiences. Instead of being that person who makes the perfect plans before undertaking responsibilities, I always end up doing things on the 11th hour with no definite plans. I get so irresponsible and I tend to make decisions out of rush. My career choice demands me to be someone who knows how to plan and make good decisions; but I am a very indecisive person who is more of responsive rather than preventive. If I couldn't change what I am today, then one day I might become a great hazard to the society instead of being of service.
In a few instances, I may have faced struggles in coping up with difficulties regarding the inadequacy of my knowledge and skills for the program; however, right now it is clear that my greatest issue of concern is my lack of a good attitude towards my studies. All these doubts that have accumulated in my mind, are making me fragile and my life precarious. All these times, I have set myself to be imprisoned in my own fears and bounded to my own limitations, making me incompetent. The incorrect mindset I have been keeping has been hindering me from working efficiently in acquiring my endeavors. The inappropriate attitudes I possess are incapacitating me to become the ideal person I envision myself to be.
My idea of success is being able to practice a profession that I can passionately work on all throughout my life. I seek to walk on a path where I spend my life acquiring knowledge, learning skills, and applying them rightfully for the benefit of myself and the society. For the future, I envision myself to be a person who maintains a good attitude towards life, a citizen who willfully takes responsibility of his role in advocating progress and development, and an innovator who enthusiastically seeks for solutions for the existing problems in our society. However, these are only my ideals; and I do not know whether there would be a bridge that connects my aspirations for the future and my actions in the present. There is always that factor of struggle in letting the convergence of theory and action be possible.
Right now it's too early to presume. I cannot say I would not enjoy the journey when I haven't fully experienced it yet; I'm still on the verge of it. Maybe the zeal that resides within me is yet to be awakened. Maybe I just have to let time do its magic. Maybe I should not let myself be shaken by the thought of the uncertainty of the future; instead, I should just focus on the present as I am building my career. Yes, I need to keep going; but of course these won't be happening if I do not change my current mindset. I think I need to develop an optimistic and competent attitude towards my aspirations. I should learn to be more responsible because in the future, I know I have a vital role to play. For now, it may not be easy just to erase all these doubts, as they recur inside my head; but what I know is that I should have faith on this career decision. The end may still not be in sight as I walk on this path; but I know I should keep my eyes on the road.
Honestly, right now I cannot really say that I am perfectly sure of the career I have chosen to pursue. Basically, I have chosen this program because I thought I had the innate qualities that make me fit for this career. Contrary to how most people think, I did not choose this profession because it is an in-demand job today in our world. We're aware that wherever city we may go, construction is booming; and that Civil Engineers are highly paid within and outside the country. With the high demand for Civil Engineers today, the number of aspirants is equivalently high as well. To be honest, I haven't actually foreseen all these things; I've only learned about these from some of my friends, and from news articles. The path I thought was easy actually had much difficulties in store, especially I was just among the thousands of aspirants.
The dilemma I am facing right now is that I cannot visualize the outcome of my career choice. All these times, I only considered my capabilities as a person; but I have failed to consider the actual direction this decision is leading me into. It's not that I am no longer interested with this program; but it's just because I am greatly unsure whether I am capable of dealing with the things practiced in this profession. I am very uncertain weather I could still be enthusiastic enough to learn more in the field I thought was best for me. I am in doubt of myself.
With my first few months in college, I did realize that I could utilize my knowledge and skills in dealing with the different aspects of the program; however, I also became aware of my own weaknesses that make me susceptible to failure if ever I could not overcome these. Though I may have managed to cope up with some difficult challenges in a year of studying, still I remain unconfident and afraid of the greater adversities that lie ahead in this career path. I always feel this incertitude whenever I contemplate on my lack of knowledge and skills in this field. Another discouraging thought is realizing I have undesirable traits as I dealt with various recent experiences. Instead of being that person who makes the perfect plans before undertaking responsibilities, I always end up doing things on the 11th hour with no definite plans. I get so irresponsible and I tend to make decisions out of rush. My career choice demands me to be someone who knows how to plan and make good decisions; but I am a very indecisive person who is more of responsive rather than preventive. If I couldn't change what I am today, then one day I might become a great hazard to the society instead of being of service.
In a few instances, I may have faced struggles in coping up with difficulties regarding the inadequacy of my knowledge and skills for the program; however, right now it is clear that my greatest issue of concern is my lack of a good attitude towards my studies. All these doubts that have accumulated in my mind, are making me fragile and my life precarious. All these times, I have set myself to be imprisoned in my own fears and bounded to my own limitations, making me incompetent. The incorrect mindset I have been keeping has been hindering me from working efficiently in acquiring my endeavors. The inappropriate attitudes I possess are incapacitating me to become the ideal person I envision myself to be.
My idea of success is being able to practice a profession that I can passionately work on all throughout my life. I seek to walk on a path where I spend my life acquiring knowledge, learning skills, and applying them rightfully for the benefit of myself and the society. For the future, I envision myself to be a person who maintains a good attitude towards life, a citizen who willfully takes responsibility of his role in advocating progress and development, and an innovator who enthusiastically seeks for solutions for the existing problems in our society. However, these are only my ideals; and I do not know whether there would be a bridge that connects my aspirations for the future and my actions in the present. There is always that factor of struggle in letting the convergence of theory and action be possible.
Right now it's too early to presume. I cannot say I would not enjoy the journey when I haven't fully experienced it yet; I'm still on the verge of it. Maybe the zeal that resides within me is yet to be awakened. Maybe I just have to let time do its magic. Maybe I should not let myself be shaken by the thought of the uncertainty of the future; instead, I should just focus on the present as I am building my career. Yes, I need to keep going; but of course these won't be happening if I do not change my current mindset. I think I need to develop an optimistic and competent attitude towards my aspirations. I should learn to be more responsible because in the future, I know I have a vital role to play. For now, it may not be easy just to erase all these doubts, as they recur inside my head; but what I know is that I should have faith on this career decision. The end may still not be in sight as I walk on this path; but I know I should keep my eyes on the road.
